I thought it would be nice if I just posted a bunch of videos of Monster. I have blog entry summarizing the ups and downs of 2009 in my head, but it still needs some work.
Anyway, here he is flying his new helicopter. It took a while for him to have it stop when it started crashing into things, but he got it!
Here he is at his favorite bounce house place:
Playing in the snow at the bounce house on New Year's Eve:
Pushing a car up the ramp, preparing for take off.
And now he is going down the ramp. Check out the luge-like start!
Video Games
Opening Presents
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Conversations, Part 2
I know I should blog about Christmas, but I just don’t have it in me. Christmas is, personally, a very challenging and depressing time for me. It is that time of the year that I feel Zach’s challenges and differentness most acutely and grieve for the childhood we will never experience together.
Instead, I would love to share some of the recent conversations he and I have had. Our conversations are unique. He doesn’t volunteer opinions. In fact, he doesn’t really answer open ended questions very well yet, so I ask him yes/no questions and he answers. I have to try very hard to keep my voice neutral and not indicate to him how I wish he would answer, but all-in-all, it’s a blast. I’ve learned so much from our little Q &A sessions. Some of it is sad, some precious, some outright hilarious.
Last night, I was asking him if he liked mommy and daddy and diego (the dog). Apparently he does (whew!). He was also sad that it was bedtime, but not scared of the dark. He likes it when I sing Scar’s parts (from Lion King), but gets’ very upset if I sing Simba’s part. Oh well.
One night while watching Snow White, he said that Snow White was nice and pretty. Mommy was nice and pretty. Zachery was nice and pretty (or rather handsome) but Daddy was not nice and not pretty. Apparently, Mr. and Monster went a few rounds and Mr. wouldn’t let him something. One night he was scared of me (after we fought the night before) and very recently I was kicked out of the room (he wanted mommy to go away, not stay).
I try to talk to him every night-ask him what happened during the day (Did you do X or Y?) what he likes, what he fears. One night he was afraid of the dark and the next night he wanted the light off. What a contrary little man he can be!
I’ll try to add some video and pictures from Christmas. Monster got a remote controlled helicopter that Mr and I enjoy a lot. Zach loves to watch it fly around and thinks it is hilarious when we can’t control it!
Instead, I would love to share some of the recent conversations he and I have had. Our conversations are unique. He doesn’t volunteer opinions. In fact, he doesn’t really answer open ended questions very well yet, so I ask him yes/no questions and he answers. I have to try very hard to keep my voice neutral and not indicate to him how I wish he would answer, but all-in-all, it’s a blast. I’ve learned so much from our little Q &A sessions. Some of it is sad, some precious, some outright hilarious.
Last night, I was asking him if he liked mommy and daddy and diego (the dog). Apparently he does (whew!). He was also sad that it was bedtime, but not scared of the dark. He likes it when I sing Scar’s parts (from Lion King), but gets’ very upset if I sing Simba’s part. Oh well.
One night while watching Snow White, he said that Snow White was nice and pretty. Mommy was nice and pretty. Zachery was nice and pretty (or rather handsome) but Daddy was not nice and not pretty. Apparently, Mr. and Monster went a few rounds and Mr. wouldn’t let him something. One night he was scared of me (after we fought the night before) and very recently I was kicked out of the room (he wanted mommy to go away, not stay).
I try to talk to him every night-ask him what happened during the day (Did you do X or Y?) what he likes, what he fears. One night he was afraid of the dark and the next night he wanted the light off. What a contrary little man he can be!
I’ll try to add some video and pictures from Christmas. Monster got a remote controlled helicopter that Mr and I enjoy a lot. Zach loves to watch it fly around and thinks it is hilarious when we can’t control it!
Monday, December 21, 2009
Babysitting, Blizzards and Birthday Presents
They called in the Winter Wallop on TV. It was the same night as my company's Christmas Party and the first time we have left Monster with someone since we moved. Through a group to which I belong, we found a great high school student to watch Monster. None of us realized that her shift was going to last as long as it did and that we would be waking up her parents at 1:00 am in order to pick her up.
She came by the night before for a walk through and to say hi to Monster. She was very impressive. She had a list of questions, some were things Mr and I hadn't yet thought of! We took Monster to his favorite bounce house the day of, and had him all ready for bed when she got here. When we got home, she said he watched a few movies and eventually fell asleep. Apparently, he woke up briefly, then when back to school. From the state of the house, he seemed to have moved from the futon (where he lays-or is it lies?-down watching his movies) to the bedroom and back again. He woke up when we got home (which was after midnight thanks to the storm-see picture above) and started crying. He grabbed my hand and said "mommy", when I answered I was there, he said "daddy" and wouldn't calm down until Mr. came in and held his hand. It was so sad and so sweet at the same time.
The snow was coming down really bad by that point and we couldn't get either the car or the truck out of our driveway, so S had to call her dad to have him pick her up. We were a bit embarrassed, but oh well. S did say she would be willing to babysit again, so it couldn't have been too horrible. Monster seemed to have come through the whole thing ok.
We woke the next morning to everything being covered in snow. The news said that Newport (the island to the east of us) got 20", so I imagine we got something near that. The car was buried and the wind was high. It was absolutely beautiful. Mr. got quite a workout shoveling us out. Monster really enjoyed playing in the snow.
Since his birthday party last weekend, we've been having him open his presents, one or so each night. This was a monster truck jump that he really liked.
Sunday, December 13, 2009
The Party at Last
Wow.
We survived.
Monster's party is finally over and, man, was it a blast! I have no idea how many kids eventually showed up; I have 5 gift bags (out of 20) left, so at least 15 kids were there (and I counted 15 presents). Because of the weather and time of the year, there were also a lot of siblings at the party as well, which both added to the chaos and the fun! I suspect that, all told, there were about 20.
The day started with a twist. One of Monster's classmate's dad was ill and her mom needed to be with him at the hospital. So I had her drop the girl off before the party so she could hang with us-which was a lot of fun and a lot of work (for me). The little girl, A, was a chatterbox-she talked nearly non-stop the entire time she was with us. She was beyond polite, with great manners, but she either asked questions or talked the entire time. When she got here, Mr had just gotten himself put together and was getting ready to take off with the food and decorations. By prior arrangement, Mr was going to go over first with the stuff and I was going to show up a bit later with Monster, so Monster didn't get too wound up (well, best laid plans and all that).
I was pretty impressed with how Monster handled the entire day. When A got here, Monster was playing with his DVDs (i.e. watching the sneak peaks and selected scenes from Disney movies. A wanted to do whatever he was doing, which was cool, but he has a really hard time sharing his DVDs, so I tried to interest A in coloring or drawing. She wasn't that interested in that but saw Monster's computer and wanted to watch some of his videos (videos of him doing things). That's another thing he wasn't good at sharing (and I eventually had to put the computer away). Then she wanted to actually watch one of his DVDs, another bad thing (for Monsters. So now, I'm getting very worried that Monster is going to pushed beyond his limits before we ever got to the party. Eventually, A played on Monster's bicycle (a Smart Cycle). Monster hovered a bit, watching her, but let her play without any problem. Monster would either jump on his trampoline or walk on the treadmill. By this point, Monster had already had more 1:1 interaction with a child than he normally gets over the entire weekend.
The weather was absolutely horrific. Cold, wet, gusty winds made walking anywhere difficult. When we got there and trudged through the puddles and up the stairs to the Beach Bounce, I found Mr surrounded by several wonderful ladies, who decorated and blew up balloons while Mr charmed everyone around him.
The parents who had showed up were very wonderful about pitching in and helping us get going. Which was fortunate, because after Mr took off (to get coffee for everyone), Monster really needed help for the first 30 minutes or so. Since we had been going to this place for the past few months, Monster could do fairly well for himself and didn't need us to hover too much. At his party, he was quite insecure for the first half hour or so. He would check in with me (look for me to make sure I was watching him) every minute or so, and would come over for hugs every 5 or 10 minutes. But he played and played and played-like all the kids did.
After about 45 minutes, he needed a break, so he asked me for his iPod and played with that for about 10 minutes. One of his friends (backstory: there were two little boys that Monster knows from the sensory room at school, N and C. We were told that Monster calls them "friends" so we sent invites to them and they both showed up), N, was watching Monster play on his iPod and when Monster was done, he let N play with it-and NO ONE touches Monster's iPod! The pattern of finding me, getting his iPod (or Dad's iPhone) repeated about 2 more times. Now, I bet parents of typical kids would think it was rude of their child to go off by him/herself during her/his birthday party, but for me, I couldn't have been prouder! It was one of the first times I had seen him recognize, in himself, that he needed a break and seeking out that break and then return to the activity. In the past, he has signaled being done with a task or area (no matter how preferred an activity it was), but when he was done he was done. Sunday, he would take a little break, have some water and then go back.
Eventually, it was time to sing Happy Birthday and blow out the candles. Forgive my horrific singing voice, but this is him blowing out his candle. Mr had worked with him all week blowing out a candle after we sang to him. He was so exhausted at this point that he mainly laid down either in the jump houses or on the floor (in everyone's way).
Toward the end of his party, he had asked to go go the library, so we (Monster, his classmate A and I) did. By the time we got home, all of us were exhausted and A's mom was done for the day and came to pick her up. I think they played well together, and although she was exhausting, it was nice to have A around.
All-in-all, the day went really well. Mr and I got to get to know some of the parents. Hopefully we can hook up with some folks for playdates. However, I noticed something I hadn't noticed before. Throughout the entire day, it seemed to me that there was a hint of sadness in Monster's eyes. To me, it seemed like he really felt his different-ness, which he doesn't seem to notice or think about most of the time. It was almost as if there was an invisible barrier between him and the other kids (except, surprisingly enough, between him and N, who was also special needs) that he wanted to cross but either didn't know how or thought he couldn't.
Maybe I'm projecting too much; I'm horribly shy and have problems in social situations as well, but I really don't think I am. One of the things I'm noticing is that it was easier on him, and us, when he lived in his own world. In there, things were safe and comforting. Out here, it is weird and scary and stressful. I understand that fear quite well; I just don't know how to help him handle it. I can't tell him that kids all think he's wonderful, because that's just not how things work. At this age, sure, kids are fairly accepting. But as he gets older, or around people who just don't know him, I can't guarantee he won't be made fun of, or pushed around-he's already experienced a kid trying to keep him from playing in a public place (other kids were trying to dominate one piece of equipment)-not all kids are nice or polite or follow the same social rules and he needs to know that I'm going to be honest and real with him (which is probably a whole 'nother blog entry).
Intellectually, I know that time, patience and self-confidence are what he needs to get through this and given how far he has already come, and the wonderful support he is getting, I'm confident that he will get there. He really is a wonderful, brave, charming little boy (well, big boy now).
We had a t-shirt available for the kids to decorate for him and I thought I would end this post with a picture of his decorated t-shirt:
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Monster's First Report Card
1=begining to develop standard
2=working and progressing towards the standard
3=Meeting the grade level standard
4=exceeding grade level standard
At our Parent Teacher Conference last week, the teachers told us it is typical for kids to have 1's and 2's at the beginning of the year.
Ok, here goes:
Learning Attitudes and behaviors
Respects others 2
Follows classroom and school rules 2
Works Independent 2
Works cooperatively with peers 2
Listens Effectively 1 (Joanie-sound familiar?)
Is responsible for homework 3 (yea, mom and dad!)
Manages transitions 2 (Thank you, Ms. V)
Is organized and prepared to learn 2
Shows persistence effort 1
Takes responsibility for own actions 2
Communications skills 2 (yea!!!!!!)
Guided Reading
1. Applies Appropriate reading strategies:
Visual cues 1
Phonics 2
Contextual clues 1
Self-corrects 1 (though I've noticed he just started doing this a little bit)
2. Reads with understanding
-Responds to literature 2
-Re-tells a story 1 (actually, he does do this, just in his own time frame and way. He'll tell us stories later, but we don't always understand them.)
Participates in group discussion 1
3. Fluency
-Demonstrates fluency and expression in oral reading 1
Self Selected Reading
Chooses appropriate literature 3
Attends to text during independent reading times 3
Reads with understanding 2
Working with Words
Uses known word parts and patterns to spell new words 1
Applies word building skills and spelling strategies independently 1
Writing
Generates ideas independently 2 (yea!!!!)
Communicates thoughts and information effectively 2 (yea!!!!!!!!!)
Uses grade appropriate capitalization and punctuation 1
Writes legibly 1
Mathematical Numbers & Operations
Counts fluently 2
Skip-counts fluently 1 (we just started doing this with him, he seems to sort of get it)
Reads and writes 2-digit numbers
Identifies and calculates value of coins 2
Addition 3
Subtraction 3
Mathematical Concepts
Shows evidence of mathematical reasoning 2
Identifies and uses number patterns 1
Understands geometric concepts 2
Science
Process Skills 3
Understands concepts 3
Applies concepts in written work 3
(it does this Engineer's heart proud over the Science score!!)
Social Studies
Understands/applies concepts 3
Understands/applies concepts in writing 3
There are a few more things, but that is the bulk of his report card. Now this is our first report card, and we are pretty happy about it!
Monster has not been wanting to go to school. When I ask him if school is Happy or sad, he often says sad, but I think that just means he isn't getting his way as much. He, by no means, seems to hate going nor does he seem to have any problems once we get him dressed and out of the door.
I wonder how much is related to him being different, or not fitting in. I know he knows he's different, just as I know he wants to be around other kids. I suspect he is scared a lot-unsure how to get to where he wants to be (playing with the other kids). It takes time, and he has never been very patient.
2=working and progressing towards the standard
3=Meeting the grade level standard
4=exceeding grade level standard
At our Parent Teacher Conference last week, the teachers told us it is typical for kids to have 1's and 2's at the beginning of the year.
Ok, here goes:
Learning Attitudes and behaviors
Respects others 2
Follows classroom and school rules 2
Works Independent 2
Works cooperatively with peers 2
Listens Effectively 1 (Joanie-sound familiar?)
Is responsible for homework 3 (yea, mom and dad!)
Manages transitions 2 (Thank you, Ms. V)
Is organized and prepared to learn 2
Shows persistence effort 1
Takes responsibility for own actions 2
Communications skills 2 (yea!!!!!!)
Guided Reading
1. Applies Appropriate reading strategies:
Visual cues 1
Phonics 2
Contextual clues 1
Self-corrects 1 (though I've noticed he just started doing this a little bit)
2. Reads with understanding
-Responds to literature 2
-Re-tells a story 1 (actually, he does do this, just in his own time frame and way. He'll tell us stories later, but we don't always understand them.)
Participates in group discussion 1
3. Fluency
-Demonstrates fluency and expression in oral reading 1
Self Selected Reading
Chooses appropriate literature 3
Attends to text during independent reading times 3
Reads with understanding 2
Working with Words
Uses known word parts and patterns to spell new words 1
Applies word building skills and spelling strategies independently 1
Writing
Generates ideas independently 2 (yea!!!!)
Communicates thoughts and information effectively 2 (yea!!!!!!!!!)
Uses grade appropriate capitalization and punctuation 1
Writes legibly 1
Mathematical Numbers & Operations
Counts fluently 2
Skip-counts fluently 1 (we just started doing this with him, he seems to sort of get it)
Reads and writes 2-digit numbers
Identifies and calculates value of coins 2
Addition 3
Subtraction 3
Mathematical Concepts
Shows evidence of mathematical reasoning 2
Identifies and uses number patterns 1
Understands geometric concepts 2
Science
Process Skills 3
Understands concepts 3
Applies concepts in written work 3
(it does this Engineer's heart proud over the Science score!!)
Social Studies
Understands/applies concepts 3
Understands/applies concepts in writing 3
There are a few more things, but that is the bulk of his report card. Now this is our first report card, and we are pretty happy about it!
Monster has not been wanting to go to school. When I ask him if school is Happy or sad, he often says sad, but I think that just means he isn't getting his way as much. He, by no means, seems to hate going nor does he seem to have any problems once we get him dressed and out of the door.
I wonder how much is related to him being different, or not fitting in. I know he knows he's different, just as I know he wants to be around other kids. I suspect he is scared a lot-unsure how to get to where he wants to be (playing with the other kids). It takes time, and he has never been very patient.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
5 RSVPs and Counting-Monster's B-Day Party Saga, Part 1
I'm a total nervous Nellie, so just ignore me, but I need to rant/vent, etc. Feel free to skip this entire post. But if you do read it, feel free to let me know what I'm missing.
We have had a total of 5 kids RSVP yes, and 2 for no.
Mr. and I had decided to prepare for all of the kids/parents, which, when we sat down and counted, was 23 kids (if 1 parent per child shows up, that's 46 people plus us-I think we are insane). So the 2 noes were welcome (though they will be missed).
We took Monster back to the bounce place last weekend, and he played there for about 90 minutes, which is good and means he will have endurance for his own party (it was fairly busy, so it was a good mimic for his bday). There was even 1 or 2 bullies trying to get him to NOT play some places that he (and well, I) dealt with. Mr. was funny, after I grumbled in his ear. He said "Do you really think he cares what those other kids say?". Unfortunately (or fortunately?), Monster did care, and would follow a direct instruction (for about 30 seconds). Finally, I, another child and the kid's mother all told him that ds was allowed to play there and that he needed to share (to be clear, I and another child both told him that Monster wasn't in his way-he wasn't-and to just play around him, his mom told him he needed to share).
I still need to put his giftbags together, I'm stressing that they aren't "cool" enough. I tried to stick to things Monster likes to play with-a moldable eraser, a gummy pencil grip (on a pencil), one of the sticks that makes noises when you turn them upside down, super bouncy ball, a pack of Monster's favorite gum, some stickers and a balloon. I'm sure (logically) that they are fine, but there is that social anxiety rearing its ugly head.
The menu is set-pizza (with me making a special one for ds and one other girl who is also gf/cf), carrot sticks, raisins, chips and juice/water, coffee and soda for the parents. Mr didn't want to serve any soda, but I told him I *would* be drinking some (I don't drink coffee, he does) so it would be rude to not offer any to the parents. Monster's "cake" is GF/CF brownies and chocolate chip cookies.
We decided to go with the No. 7 candle (instead of 7 candles) and Mr is going to work with Monster this week to teach him to blow it out. We are planning on having all the kids "help" him blow it out.
Presents have been a tough one for us. On the one hand, we don't expect anyone to give him anything-times are tight and we are of the "your presence is the present" mindset. On the other hand, Mr thinks this is a great opportunity for us to see what other kids are playing with (Monster just does DVD sneak peaks, internet and his bike games) to see if they are interesting to him. When asked, I originally said "books or cars", since he does enjoy cars occasionally, but Mr suggested we ask the parents (who ask our opinion) to bring something their child likes to play with-a favorite book or whatnot. Partially so we can have something they enjoy for future (hopefully) playdates.
Also, since Monster isn't the best at opening presents, we decided to have the child help him open his/her present to him.
Finally, we bought a t-shirt from the bounce place and I'm going to ask the kids to decorate it with sharpie markers for Monster (then he can wear it to school, or use it for show-tell).
I was also going to use the time to see if parents want to exchange contact info with each other ( a sign-up type of sheet that I would pass to the other parents with the thank you cards). I've been toying with the idea of a yahoo group, but think that may be too much.
Well, if you made it this far, you get a cookie-a gluten/casein/dye/nut-free cookie!
And, yes, I do realize I'm worrying way too much. It's genetic.
We have had a total of 5 kids RSVP yes, and 2 for no.
Mr. and I had decided to prepare for all of the kids/parents, which, when we sat down and counted, was 23 kids (if 1 parent per child shows up, that's 46 people plus us-I think we are insane). So the 2 noes were welcome (though they will be missed).
We took Monster back to the bounce place last weekend, and he played there for about 90 minutes, which is good and means he will have endurance for his own party (it was fairly busy, so it was a good mimic for his bday). There was even 1 or 2 bullies trying to get him to NOT play some places that he (and well, I) dealt with. Mr. was funny, after I grumbled in his ear. He said "Do you really think he cares what those other kids say?". Unfortunately (or fortunately?), Monster did care, and would follow a direct instruction (for about 30 seconds). Finally, I, another child and the kid's mother all told him that ds was allowed to play there and that he needed to share (to be clear, I and another child both told him that Monster wasn't in his way-he wasn't-and to just play around him, his mom told him he needed to share).
I still need to put his giftbags together, I'm stressing that they aren't "cool" enough. I tried to stick to things Monster likes to play with-a moldable eraser, a gummy pencil grip (on a pencil), one of the sticks that makes noises when you turn them upside down, super bouncy ball, a pack of Monster's favorite gum, some stickers and a balloon. I'm sure (logically) that they are fine, but there is that social anxiety rearing its ugly head.
The menu is set-pizza (with me making a special one for ds and one other girl who is also gf/cf), carrot sticks, raisins, chips and juice/water, coffee and soda for the parents. Mr didn't want to serve any soda, but I told him I *would* be drinking some (I don't drink coffee, he does) so it would be rude to not offer any to the parents. Monster's "cake" is GF/CF brownies and chocolate chip cookies.
We decided to go with the No. 7 candle (instead of 7 candles) and Mr is going to work with Monster this week to teach him to blow it out. We are planning on having all the kids "help" him blow it out.
Presents have been a tough one for us. On the one hand, we don't expect anyone to give him anything-times are tight and we are of the "your presence is the present" mindset. On the other hand, Mr thinks this is a great opportunity for us to see what other kids are playing with (Monster just does DVD sneak peaks, internet and his bike games) to see if they are interesting to him. When asked, I originally said "books or cars", since he does enjoy cars occasionally, but Mr suggested we ask the parents (who ask our opinion) to bring something their child likes to play with-a favorite book or whatnot. Partially so we can have something they enjoy for future (hopefully) playdates.
Also, since Monster isn't the best at opening presents, we decided to have the child help him open his/her present to him.
Finally, we bought a t-shirt from the bounce place and I'm going to ask the kids to decorate it with sharpie markers for Monster (then he can wear it to school, or use it for show-tell).
I was also going to use the time to see if parents want to exchange contact info with each other ( a sign-up type of sheet that I would pass to the other parents with the thank you cards). I've been toying with the idea of a yahoo group, but think that may be too much.
Well, if you made it this far, you get a cookie-a gluten/casein/dye/nut-free cookie!
And, yes, I do realize I'm worrying way too much. It's genetic.
Friday, December 4, 2009
Our First Parent-Teacher Conference
I have videos that I'll upload later, showing Monster reading and cutting and the like, but I wanted to put down an account of Mr. and I's first parent teacher conference while it is still relatively fresh in my memory.
Our previous school was somewhat special, it only included (for the most part) children with special needs. Thus, we didn't really have things like open house and parent teacher conferences. Then, we would consider our annual IEP as the parent-teacher conference with multiple off-the-cuff meetings whenever parents and service providers/teachers managed to find time.
So today was a new experience for us, and with all of our new experiences, it was both wonderful and emotional. Of course, I had a difficult time not crying (and in fact did shed some tears but Mr. says it wasn't noticeable). I found out something I never knew about Monster, and given the degree to which Mr and I know him (which is quite extensive as we have had to infer emotions/moods likes/dislikes given his previously limited verbal skills), it was a unique and blessed surprise to find out that he likes to write. Not just copy letter or words (which he really doesn't seem to enjoy, or rather rushes through most of the time we work with him) but to put down thoughts and feelings.
When we first found out he was keeping a journal at school, as a class assignment, I naturally assumed he was just copying something that someone else wrote or told him to write (To the wonderful women of his school, my deepest apologies for such an ignorant assumption). Not so. Not so at all. He writes (in his very poor handwriting, rushing too much, I'm sure) about what he sees in pictures, what he draws (he does quite a wonderful self portrait ;)), what he likes. His teacher told us that he will often keep writing beyond the simple statements they expect and they are even incorporating his writing down of requests. It may seem odd to the parent of a typical child to find out that their kid likes chocolate chip cookies-their kids have probably told them many times, both directly and indirectly, of their affection for them. I knew that Monster was partial to cookies since he will ask for them, but for the first time I saw, in his own hand, that he likes chocolate chip cookies (even the gluten/casein free ones we give him). He, apparently, also enjoys playing heads up, seven up, which was a personal favorite of mine growing up, and has raised his hand in class.
And we all marveld at how wonderful Monster's aide is and it just reinforces what we've known all along, Monster can do this if he has the right support.
And he's smart. I'm sure the teachers had no idea how much it meant to Mr and I to hear an educational professional say he was smart. Once upon a time in an alternate universe, Monster's IQ was measured at 58. There was no discussion about the relevance or how kids with autism had issues with IQ tests, yet it was implied that he had cognitive delays. It really wouldn't have mattered to us if he did have cognitive delays, but given the inaccuracies of the testing, we had no idea if he did indeed have more challenges to face. It may not be a wise or good thing to do, but I do have expectations about Monster's future and the not-knowing was worrisome, at least to me (I think Mr. has always had faith). Being told he was smart, along with his enjoyment of wanting to be around other kids does a lot to put my mind at ease.
All-in-all, a very wonderful (if also emotional) experience and one I would gladly repeat!
Today's videos include Monster reading with his dad-it is a PEC book where he matches the icon (an illustrated word to finish a sentence-a cool way to learn vocabulary, especially for a visual learner like Monster).One is him cutting out a shape (actually I decided to go with him doing math) and one is him at horseback riding. I'll post them in a bit.
Our previous school was somewhat special, it only included (for the most part) children with special needs. Thus, we didn't really have things like open house and parent teacher conferences. Then, we would consider our annual IEP as the parent-teacher conference with multiple off-the-cuff meetings whenever parents and service providers/teachers managed to find time.
So today was a new experience for us, and with all of our new experiences, it was both wonderful and emotional. Of course, I had a difficult time not crying (and in fact did shed some tears but Mr. says it wasn't noticeable). I found out something I never knew about Monster, and given the degree to which Mr and I know him (which is quite extensive as we have had to infer emotions/moods likes/dislikes given his previously limited verbal skills), it was a unique and blessed surprise to find out that he likes to write. Not just copy letter or words (which he really doesn't seem to enjoy, or rather rushes through most of the time we work with him) but to put down thoughts and feelings.
When we first found out he was keeping a journal at school, as a class assignment, I naturally assumed he was just copying something that someone else wrote or told him to write (To the wonderful women of his school, my deepest apologies for such an ignorant assumption). Not so. Not so at all. He writes (in his very poor handwriting, rushing too much, I'm sure) about what he sees in pictures, what he draws (he does quite a wonderful self portrait ;)), what he likes. His teacher told us that he will often keep writing beyond the simple statements they expect and they are even incorporating his writing down of requests. It may seem odd to the parent of a typical child to find out that their kid likes chocolate chip cookies-their kids have probably told them many times, both directly and indirectly, of their affection for them. I knew that Monster was partial to cookies since he will ask for them, but for the first time I saw, in his own hand, that he likes chocolate chip cookies (even the gluten/casein free ones we give him). He, apparently, also enjoys playing heads up, seven up, which was a personal favorite of mine growing up, and has raised his hand in class.
And we all marveld at how wonderful Monster's aide is and it just reinforces what we've known all along, Monster can do this if he has the right support.
And he's smart. I'm sure the teachers had no idea how much it meant to Mr and I to hear an educational professional say he was smart. Once upon a time in an alternate universe, Monster's IQ was measured at 58. There was no discussion about the relevance or how kids with autism had issues with IQ tests, yet it was implied that he had cognitive delays. It really wouldn't have mattered to us if he did have cognitive delays, but given the inaccuracies of the testing, we had no idea if he did indeed have more challenges to face. It may not be a wise or good thing to do, but I do have expectations about Monster's future and the not-knowing was worrisome, at least to me (I think Mr. has always had faith). Being told he was smart, along with his enjoyment of wanting to be around other kids does a lot to put my mind at ease.
All-in-all, a very wonderful (if also emotional) experience and one I would gladly repeat!
Today's videos include Monster reading with his dad-it is a PEC book where he matches the icon (an illustrated word to finish a sentence-a cool way to learn vocabulary, especially for a visual learner like Monster).One is him cutting out a shape (actually I decided to go with him doing math) and one is him at horseback riding. I'll post them in a bit.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)